Mitigating Risk in Consensual Non-Consent (CNC) Scenes
Consensual Non-Consent, often referred to as CNC or “rape play,” is a type of kink where partners negotiate scenes that involve a deliberate illusion of non-consent.
This form of edge play is built on intense trust, thorough communication, and detailed negotiation. This kink is extremely psychological for all parties involved. It also carries the additional risk of looking and sounding like very real violence or assault to any outside observer. It’s worth noting that CNC can be done in a single scene, or can be a component of an ongoing dynamic.
Regardless of context, CNC is considered edge play and should be approached with additional care.
Common risks of CNC:
Drop
Miscommunication leading to actual violation of consent
(Re)traumatization
Bystanders misinterpreting the scene and intervening
Legal consequences
Key requirements of CNC:
Thorough, extensive negotiations
Strong, established trust between all participants
First-Aid Kit
Emergency response plan
Things to Consider During CNC:
Negotiate and Plan the Scene Thoroughly
Talk explicitly about what the scene should and should not include. Is resistance physical, verbal, or both? Is it okay to use certain language or not? Are there words, actions, or tones that might cause real emotional harm? All of this must be discussed before you do anything.
Vet your partner like your sanity depends on it (because it kind of does)
This kind of play requires serious trust in your partner. If you don’t know your partner well enough to believe they’ll respect every single limit and boundary, don’t plan a CNC scene with them. It’s better to be overly cautious than overly confident.
Determine how or if you’ll be using safewords, and what those safewords mean
Some CNC scenes involve deliberately ignoring pleas to stop. In these cases, safeword alternatives can be absolutely essential. If “red” is not on the table, make sure there is a very specific and clear non-verbal signal or codeword that cannot be mistaken for anything else but a desire to stop the scene completely and immediately.
Some kinksters prefer to participate in a CNC scene without any option to safeword. This is a very, very high-risk approach and brings with it a number of potential consequences, not the least of which is long-term psychological trauma if you wish to stop and can’t. Both partners should be 100% comfortable with this approach, as well as being willing to accept the risks that come with such a decision.
Be mindful of surroundings and potential witnesses
A CNC scene sounds and looks like a crime to someone who doesn’t know it’s consensual. If you're playing in a shared space or semi-public area (even a shared apartment with roommates), let the event organizers and/or dungeon monitors know what you have in store. It’s worth noting that most public dungeons won’t permit CNC play, so be sure to get the okay before engaging in such a scene.
Have a plan for worst-case scenario or potential drop
If your partner has a traumatic reaction to the scene, take steps to alleviate their emotional duress quickly and gently. Know how to recognize their disassociation if it starts, and have a previously-agreed upon plan for what to do. Keep in mind that drop (both subdrop and Topdrop) from CNC can come long after the physical experience ends. Make space to reconnect and talk, even if it seems like everything is fine.
These considerations are not designed to be advice on how to play safely—they are things to think about prior to engaging in dangerous forms of play.
No matter the precautions you take in this kind of activity, you cannot guarantee the safety of those involved. Approach this form of play with extreme caution.
