The Difference Between Kink & Fetish

There are two common questions newcomers ask themselves about kink and fetish. What’s the difference? “Kink” and “fetish” are often used interchangeably and often overlap in common practice (a fetish is kinky, for example). 

What is a kink?

A kink is anything outside of what you consider to be ‘normal’.

What is a fetish?

A fetish is arousal caused by an object, body part, or activity.

A fetish can also include the object, body part, or activity itself, which is where you might hear “having a fetish for” something.

Some fetishes you might encounter are:

• Body Part Fetishes:

  • Feet (Podophilia)

  • Hair (Trichophilia)

  • Breasts (Mammaphilia)

• Clothing Fetishes:

  • Shoes (Retifism)

  • Uniforms

  • Leather, Latex, or PVC

• Other Common Fetishes:

  • Spanking

  • Breath Play

  • Clowns (Coulrophilia or Bozophilia)

Identifying as a Fetishist

Whereas a kinkster is someone who identifies as kinky, a fetishist is a person whose kink identity is predominantly driven by one or more specific fetishes. You can read more about what kink really means in this article.

As with the term kinkster, fetishist is a general identifier for someone who has a fetish. Fetishists tend to build their identity around what appeals to them, and greatly enjoy sharing their passion with like-minded partners. There are literally an infinite number of fetishes in the universe. Often, fetishes will cross over and be adopted into the term ‘kink’, and really, identifying as a kinkster or a fetishist is a personal choice.

Some people argue that the psychology of fetishes suggests a past event or reason caused them. Others say you have no more control over being aroused by an object than over your sexuality in general. There have been many claims of aversion therapies and methodologies throughout history, but we’ve yet to find substantial evidence suggesting a fetish can be cured, and we don’t think anyone has the right to tell someone else that they should be cured.

There will always be people who don’t understand a fetish, or don’t agree with it from a moral perspective. Sadly, people can be intolerant of what they don’t understand. Realistically, as long as you're not breaking any laws, what other people define as normal doesn't need to be the same as your definition.

We encourage you to find out more about what interests you in kink. Check out our Kynklopedia for quick definitions of common terms, read articles with more in-depth definitions, or visit our Essentials section to start learning more.

Remember: whatever turns you on, odds are that you aren’t alone.