A Guide to Spanking
Spankings can happen in a number of positions, each with different sensations. Partners might also enjoy exploring humiliation or power exchange kinks whilst engaging in this activity.
Spanking is one of the most popular fetishes in kink and BDSM. It’s so popular that an entire subculture, including spanking-specific roles and conferences, has developed around this kinky act.
Whilst spanking is indeed popular, you don’t have to engage in spanking to be kinky. Whether or not you enjoy receiving or giving spankings is no indicator for how kinky you are. S-types don’t have to like getting spanked, just as much as D-types don’t have to enjoy giving them.
A spanko is an individual who enjoys giving or receiving spankings. Depending on the side of the slash, spankos can also be known as Spankers or spankees. Spankers are also referred to as Tops, Disciplinarians, and Mentors. Other names for spankees include bottom, brat, charge, ward, or mentee. As with all kink roles, those who enjoy spankings can be any number of additional roles and labels. An individual for whom spanking is their only kink is also called a Spanko Purist.
There are a number of positions that can be used in spankings, and each has a different sensation and feel.
Many of these positions can also touch on humiliation or power exchange kinks, and the intent behind the act plays a large part in how it’s performed.
Ranking spanking pain levels (or any form of impact play) depends on a number of factors, such as the implement used, the pain tolerance of the bottom, and the experience level of the Top. The below rankings are based on biology and physics.
Top Five Spanking Positions
#1: Diaper position
A Spanker holding up the legs of a spankee (or the spankee holding their own legs up) as though changing a diaper is perhaps the most painful spanking position.
Along with the potential psychological impacts of such a position, the spanker has access to the most sensitive skin between the cheeks and top of the thighs. The butt cheeks are tight and wiggling isn't really possible in this position, either.
#2: Bending over to touch toes or knees
If the spankee is bent over, a number of muscles are working to keep them from not falling forward or raising up too high. It can be an uncomfortable position to hold, and is considered one of the most painful positions.
The buttcheeks are spread tight which also increases pain.
#3: Standing against an object
If the spankee is standing against an immovable object, the strikes can have significantly more force. Depending on the object used, pushing forward can stretch the cheeks and tense muscles, producing a more painful spanking.
#4: Over-the-Knee (OTK)
OTK is a more moderate pain level, because the cheeks are pushed out just a little. This allows for a hand to strike more sensitive areas of the bottom, as well as flexing some muscles, which increases pain level. However, there is still ample room to wiggle (assuming the Spanker allows it, of course).
#5: Laying flat on a bed
Laying stomach-down on a bed, with the legs together, is one of the least painful ways to be spanked. Muscles are able to relax completely, which makes each strike more bearable. This position also allows movement, such as kicking or wiggling, which can reduce the sting of the spanking.
Safety Considerations for Spanking
Spanking is considered a form of impact play, and as such there are a number of safety considerations to keep in mind. We encourage you to review the impact play risk mitigation guide prior to engaging in this activity.
Remember: Being kinky includes having fun, and if someone isn’t into spankings, that doesn’t mean they aren’t kinky - it just means they’re not be the best partner for this activity.
As with any kinky activity, understanding the importance of consent, negotiations, limits, and safewords is crucial.
